What My ‘Better’ Days With Fibromyalgia Are Like
On the surface, a “better” day with fibromyalgia might look like a day of normalcy—maybe even productivity. From the outside, it might seem as though the pain and fatigue have taken a break, allowing me to live a life untouched by chronic illness. But this illusion hides a deeper truth, one that only those with invisible illnesses like fibromyalgia truly understand.
A better day does not mean a pain-free day. It simply means a day where the pain is manageable, the fog is lighter, and the fatigue is less overwhelming. It means I can get out of bed without feeling like I’ve run a marathon in my sleep. I might even make breakfast, reply to a few emails, or go for a short walk. But each of these simple actions comes with a cost that most people will never see.
There’s a constant inner negotiation happening. If I shower today, will I have the energy to make dinner? If I take a walk, will I crash by mid-afternoon? On better days, I make calculated decisions, choosing the least draining activities and pacing myself with military precision. The fear of overdoing it is always there, lurking in the background, because I know that the wrong move could trigger a flare that will sideline me for days—or weeks.
One of the most misunderstood aspects of fibromyalgia is that improvement is not linear. A better day today does not mean I’m getting better. It doesn’t mean the illness is receding or that I’m healing. It simply means that, for reasons even medical science has yet to fully explain, the symptoms are less severe for now. There’s a cruel unpredictability to this condition. A stretch of good hours can be followed by a wave of debilitating pain or sudden exhaustion without any clear trigger.
On these better days, I smile more. I might even laugh without it feeling forced. But behind each smile is caution. Joy is tempered with restraint. Because I know how quickly the tide can turn. I know that tomorrow might not be like today. In fact, I expect it won’t be.
Better days also come with guilt. When I am able to go out, see friends, or complete a small task, I worry that others will assume I’m fine. That they’ll question the reality of my condition. That they’ll forget the pain I endure on the days when I cannot even lift my head from the pillow. So I find myself over-explaining, justifying, defending my own body’s unpredictability.
And yet, I am grateful for these days. Grateful to feel something close to peace in my own skin, even if only for a few hours. I cherish the moments when I can read a book without needing to nap afterward or sit outside and feel the sun without it draining all my energy. These are not monumental victories, but in the world of fibromyalgia, they feel enormous.
Emotionally, these days are a mixed bag. Hopeful yet cautious. Free yet tethered. There’s a strange sense of mourning that comes with temporary relief—the painful reminder of what life used to feel like before chronic illness took over. And still, I hold onto that fleeting normalcy with both hands, treasuring every small win.
Living with fibromyalgia means redefining what a good day looks like. It’s no longer about milestones or productivity, It’s about comfort. It’s about autonomy, It’s about doing a little more than yesterday without paying for it tomorrow. On better days, I don’t ask for more. I simply ask for this moment of stillness to last just a little bit longer.
So, what are my better days like? They are careful, quiet celebrations. They are calm waters in a stormy sea, They are a chance to breathe a little easier, to stretch without seizing, to move without bracing. But they are also reminders of how delicate this balance is, and how precious even the smallest reprieve can be.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)
1. Are better days with fibromyalgia completely pain-free?
No, better days still involve some level of pain, but it is more manageable compared to flare days. The discomfort is lower in intensity and may allow for some normal activities.
2. Can fibromyalgia symptoms completely go away on good days?
Symptoms may lessen, but they rarely disappear. Fatigue, stiffness, and brain fog can still linger, even on days that feel better than usual.
3. How do you manage your energy on better days?
Through pacing strategies like the spoon theory, prioritizing essential tasks, taking breaks, and avoiding overstimulation to prevent triggering a flare.
4. Do better days mean fibromyalgia is improving?
Not necessarily. Fibromyalgia fluctuates and better days do not indicate long-term improvement or recovery. It’s a part of the natural ebb and flow of the condition.
5. How can loved ones support someone on their better days?
Offer support without making assumptions about recovery. Understand that these days are rare and should be treated gently. Respect the person’s boundaries and pace.
6. Is it normal to feel emotional on better days with fibromyalgia?
Absolutely. Better days often bring a mix of relief, hope, and grief. It’s normal to feel joy for the respite and sadness for the reminder of what used to be.
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